This is probably going to be long but I think I need to finally do it, get it out of me.
At the begining of the year me and my wife seperated after 14 years. The seperation was horrible and things that happened hospitalized me for a bit. I tried to stay with my wife, not emotionally but physically, to help care for the children (our kids had been living with thier alcoholic violent grandmother) but things wee done that i could not be around and the day after I left she shipped the kids back to her mother.
I spent a few months homeless, bouncing from place to place until I finally found my own apartment.
When I got the apartment the understanding was I would have the kids live with me so i got a 2 bedroom accross the street from an elementary school and a high school.
At about this time I let my wife use my car to ferry around the children, I did not know she had a warrent out for an unpaid ticket, she got pulled over and my car was inpounded for 30 day. I was unable to afford the impound costs and lost my car.
About a week after that my ex tells me she has just gotten a new car and that she will be having the children live with her, 2 days later I got sued for child support.
I am in no way shy about paying child support, I am a bit irate over the fact that the state will help her get child support because she applied for state medical benifits for the kids instead of asking me to add them to my insurance (I had thought they were on her insurance). I also found out that my oldest daughter was not only living with a friend of hers, but not even in the same city, yet my ex had filed for benifits and child support for all 3.
During this time I attempted to speak with my kids and I wasn't getting an answer. Since the caregiver, her bf, is on morphine and had already threatened to shoot me I started to get nervous and called for a well check on my kids. Since then my phone number has been blocked by my ex.
I then contacted the state to find out what my rights to my children are, and this is where I lost it.
I was informed that since me and my wife have not filed divorce ($300 I don't have) I have no recourse to make her let me see or talk to my children, they also stated that child support is based not on my available income, but is based on my gross pay with no account taken of my bills, in order to change it I would have to have a hearing in front of a judge saying I cant afford child support, will not be pretty.
Last weekend I was suppose to get all 3 of my kids, I was told by my ex that she couldn't get ahold of our oldest daughter so I can have them next weekend.
What is killing me is I have no idea what is happening with my kids, no email, txt, voicemail I leave or send is answered. My number is now blocked (because she feels harrassed when I talk to her, funny when I call for my kids she should be at work as far as I know) and I can talk to my boy if I happen to see him online playing a game.
As it stands I havent heard or seen my oldest daughter in over a month, I have no idea where she is living, who she is living with. I havent spoken to my 2 youngest in 2 weeks. I have to somehow pay $700 before oct 27th or face possible jail time for driving without insurance and on a suspended lic (I was stupid and tried to drive a block after not driving for 2 years because my wife had just had surgery on her foot). I cannot afford divorce ($280 in Snohomish county wa) so I have no ability to force my wife to let me see or contact my children. I can't really afford food and cant get a 2nd job (I commute 90 minutes each way to work and work 8:30 - 5:30 mon - fri). I have no family to help or discuss or lean on.
There is alot more to this, I used to equate my seperation as a mix up of a bad anal porn and jerry springer with a dash of Hallmark tossed in for good measure, but I have to end here.
Thank you again.
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